MAKING TIME FOR INTIMACY, LOVE AND SEXUALITY
Author: Dr. Jaqueline Brendler
In many long-lasting relationships, very little time is dedicated to intimacy, love and sexuality.
To propose a rethink about the effort to make time for intimacy, love and sexuality.
PROPOSAL: Think about the following:
- How many minutes each day do couples reserve for themselves, aside from family matters?
- Does a fear of intimacy exist? A fear of deepening our love?
- Are the identity and limits of each partner respected? Is there admiration for one another?
- Is happiness possible for the 'social couple' alone, without the presence of intimacy between them?
- Do couples leave behind both their individual and collective dreams after starting a family? Do they talk about this?
- Is the loving partner appreciated? What are his/her fears, needs and interests? Does he/she receive emotional support to evolve and in times of difficulty?
- Is the partner's behavior approved of?
- Is it possible to continue building a loving relationship without investing time and dedication (care) to each other? Is there real connection and commitment between them?
- Are you capable of, or force yourself to live with the less than ideal version of your partner?
- What quality does sexuality hold when it the last and quickest act that the couple perform?
- Setting aside free time to relax, for sexual pleasure, is one of the ways to discover and enjoy full erotic potential. Is the exploration of new sexual practices permitted?
Many couples in the post modern era underestimate the real importance of intimacy, love and sexuality. Couple Therapists should be on the alert for such aspects, as they continue as paramount for the quality of a long-lasting relationship.
Book of Abstracts of XVII World Congress of Sexology , 10-15 July, 2005, Montreal , Canada, page 307 ( N° 1011.19).